Red All Over

So let's pretend for a moment that it isn't creepy that I read your blog occasionally (I find its a decent way to keep up with political news i sometimes don't have time to look for myself) and move on to the real issue here.
I read this entry before I went to class this morning, and I've spent a lot of the day formulating a response. (Let's pretend that's not even creepier.)
What do you say to the women who regret their abortion? Of course there isn't any easy answer. But its clear to me - we all make decisions we regret. For a simplified example, I could say to you that I regret quite a few tequila soaked nights, but I'm not about to try and force my belief of tequila as the anti-christ onto you, or try and ban tequila altogether. Its really the same with abortion. Every woman is going to feel differently about the abortion that she's had, and certainly some might regret their decision. But that doesn't mean they should prevent other women from making the same decision - if they believe that abortion is wrong, then they can make the personal choice to refrain from having any more abortions. Impeding the access of other women to abortions that they wish to have is crossing the line, I think.
I went on to think...why do these women regret their abortions? Why is there a culture in this country that stigmatizes women who have chosen to end their pregnancies? Were these women harrassed after their abortions? Were they told they had sinned? Did they feel as if they were being looked down upon because of their decision? Perhaps if this culture changed, if abortion was a truly acceptable option instead of one that is stigmatized, if there was a network of women who felt comfortable talking about their abortion experiences, fewer women would regret their abortions.
One of the things that irks me most about sites that say that 'women deserve better than abortion' is the repeated claim that abortion is a) linked to breast cancer or b) a dangerous procedure. Truth is, there isn't any concrete evidence linking breast cancer to abortions, and and first trimester abortion is safer than a tonsilectomy (i'm not 100% sure on this, but i think I remember Marlene Fried saying first trimester abortions are the safest elective surgeries that are performed.) If you want to talk about something that hurts women, talk about things like stomach stapling and major cosmetic surgery. Women deserve better than both of those things, but I don't see anti-choice protesters out protesting gastric bypass surgery, which many women choose in an attempt to fit in with typical beauty standards, and a procedure that has a 1 in 200 fatality rate. I think that the 'women deserve better' movement isn't particularly worried about women's rights, but really about the rights of the fetus, just like the rest of the anti-choice movement.
I don't know, I just rambled a lot, and maybe it doesn't really make sense. But maybe just some things to think about.

Good thoughts, Devon. (Let's pretend I don't find it flattering that you apparently check my blog more often than I update it.)

Obviously I agree with you that impeding women's access to abortion is dangerous and a bad idea. But I don't think comparing it to drinking too much tequila cuts it.

And while the Women Deserve Better site is indeed putting out some pretty medically questionable arguments, it's worth poking around a bit, as is the Feminists for Life group that's sponsoring it. First time I've seen anyone on that side of the argument acknowledge that abortions occur within a context where women don't have adequate access to childcare, health care, and so forth.

Here's the basic issue. I don't want a culture that encourages abortion, because in many cases I think it's a serious moral wrong, and I think we have enough problems already viewing human life as a disposable commodity (see: killing children in Iraq). I want a culture where contraception is widely accessible and both men and women are expected to be responsible enough to use it. I want a culture where it goes without saying that (potential) parents, no matter their age or economic circumstance, will have the social/financial/etc. resources necessary to raise children.

Ultimately, I would share the vision of Wolf:

"Now: try to imagine real gender equality. Actually, try to imagine an America that is female-dominated, since a true working democracy in this country would reflect our 54-46 voting advantage.

Now imagine such a democracy, in which women would be valued so very highly, as a world that is accepting and responsible about human sexuality; in which there is no coerced sex without serious jailtime; in which there are affordable, safe contraceptives available for the taking in every public health building; in which there is economic parity for women--and basic economic subsistence for every baby born; and in which every young American woman knows about and understands her natural desire as a treasure to cherish, and responsibly, when the time is right, on her own terms, to share.

In such a world, in which the idea of gender as a barrier has become a dusty artifact, we would probably use a very different language about what would be--then--the rare and doubtless traumatic event of abortion. That language would probably call upon respect and responsibility, grief and mourning. In that world we might well describe the unborn and the never-to-be-born with the honest words of life.

And in that world, passionate feminists might well hold candlelight vigils at abortion clinics, standing shoulder to shoulder with the doctors who work there, commemorating and saying goodbye to the dead."

Yeah, yeah, so the tequila argument doesn't cut it. It was the first thing that popped into my head.
Chances are, we're not going to agree on "when life begins" and I don't really think we need to. I don't agree with your argument that abortion is another instance of regarding human life as a disposable commodity, because I don't consider a fetus a human life. Furthermore, I think that by demonizing abortion, by discouraging abortion, women who have had abortions are marginalized, stigmatized, left out in the cold. Women who might have had abortions otherwise feel as if they can't (or shouldn't) and end up carrying to term a child they don't really want.
But - its probably not worth arguing, and I don't feel any particular desire to try and change your mind. I appreciate your beliefs, and even more than that, I appreciate that you were willing to put your moral qualms aside and come to the March over the weekend to show your support for something that you don't agree with, but deem (currently, anyway) necessary. I think that shows incredible strength of character.

michael, speakers at the march/rally _did_ address the issues you brought up in your commentary- before you deigned to show up. it was not "abortion-centric", it was about reproductive health of women as an issue of social justice. it was talking about enlightened sex ed (meaning not abstinence only), easy access to contraceptives and as a last resort, when everything else fails, safe and legal abortion across class and race lines.
it was the largest march in the history of the us feminist movement (whether you buy it or not).
when abortion was legalized in india, the feminists of that time did not support it on the grounds that it would hence legalize sex selection based abortions and female feticide. coming out of that feminist tradition, i'm very ambivalent myself about the whole issue of choice (individual or community), but since the social conditions are very different in this society, the struggles are very different as well. i agree that the pro choice movement needs to lose its narrow focus and become a movement for life, but the lives of actual human beings (which i believe fetuses are not) irrespective of race and class. i believe that this march was a step towards that vision, not a step back, and i felt empowered and moved as a woman of color who has criticized the american pro-choice movement in past for not including that vision.
i know that i have said most of this to you in past, and that i may be repeating what devon has already expressed so clearly and beautifully, but i was annoyed at your postings, especially your response to devon, and i wanted to put in my two cents-prachee
PS. I was deeply offended that you would compare women having abortions to soldiers killing civilians in Iraq. People have the right to disagree about when human life begins without being labelled murderers or devaluers of human life. I have more respect for people who believe that life begins after (rather than at) conception and behave accordingly than for those who pontificate about the sanctity of life before birth and then have no compunctions about blithely killing people after they emerge from the womb because they were born to the "wrong people" or born in the "wrong place"- Catherine

Prachee, please re-read what I wrote more carefully. Among the things I did not say is that the speakers were abortion-centric, that it was not the largest _feminist_ march in U.S. history, and that fetuses are exactly the same thing as human beings.

What I would like to clarify is my unwisely phrased comment about Iraq. My point was NOT to draw a direct comparison between women having abortions and soldiers killing civilians.

The point of Wolf's article, the major reason for my post to begin with and which I urge you read if you get the chance, is that the feminist movement loses the moral high ground when it denies that there are moral dimensions to the question of whether to have an abortion. The pro-choice movement has frequently resorted to "political rhetoric in which the fetus means nothing." Such a notion is totally alienating to much of the population, and it allows the debate to be framed in a particularly twisted way by the other side.

"Clinging to a rhetoric about abortion in which there is no life and no death, we entangle our beliefs in a series of self-delusions, fibs and evasions. And we risk becoming precisely what our critics charge us with being: callous, selfish and casually destructive men and women who share a cheapened view of human life."

The alternative is to acknowledge that a fetus is a form of life -- which is different from giving it "personhood" -- and reframe the question of abortion as occupying a moral spectrum, in which having an abortion is sometimes the best choice for both mother and (would-be) baby, but is never a desirable option, nor one devoid of moral consequence.